Monday, December 8, 2008

finally, a post NOT about my kids...

Are you Martha or Maxine?

• Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of an ice cream cone to prevent ice cream drips.
• Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake! You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it, anyway!

• To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.
• Buy Hungry Jack mashed potato mix. Keeps in the pantry for up to a year

• When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.
• Go to the bakery! They'll even decorate it for you!

• If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant 'fix-me-up.'
• If you over-salt a dish while you are cooking, that's too bad. Please recite with me the real woman's motto: 'I made it, you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes!'

• Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks.
• Celery? Never heard of it!

• Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.
• The Mrs. Smith frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust, so I don't.

• Cure for headaches: take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.
• Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink! All your pains go away!

• If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dish washing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.
• Go ask that very cute neighbor if he can open it for you.

• Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.
• Leftover wine??????????? HELLO!!!!!!!


RichFam said...

Ha! I love it.

I would say I am about equal parts Martha and Maxine...
...but is it sad that when I read those Martha tips, I got excited about trying them?


Lisa said...

Oh, there's no question - can you guess? I think it may be part of why I went back to work - i'm NO Martha!

Misty Burns said...

i am soooooo MAXINE.. hahaha I love her!!! awesome!

Kerry said...

Oh this just confirms that I am a Martha 100%!

Bronie said...

i'm embarrassed to say... i think the scale tilts a little more toward martha. crap! when did that happen?

Sonja Chandler said...

I'm a Martha. I can't deny it so I'm not gonna even try.
By the way did you see the studded pine cone wreath on her website for the holidays?

Just askin.